Evil Old Ladie Barbie

I've been trying to think of a two word combination that when heard or read has the ability to so instantly enrage me more than this pair:

Ann Coulter

And all I can come up with is "child molester".

Just the mention of her name in an article, and I experience a deep, visceral reaction. Although, I must admit, when I see her (as opposed to reading her name), I get an even more interesting reaction. First, there is the hatred. The deep deep hatred of her. Of the shit she knowingly puts into the world, all for the purpose of enriching herself. There are few people worse than those who purposefully make the world a shittier place for their own benefit. But then another thing happens. I am struck with something like a detached, scientific curiosity.

What exactly is she? She almost appears to be human. Not quite, but almost. Like if you looked at sketches of aging fashion models, and then tried to make a human from those sketches. It's like a toymaker made an evil, shrewish looking Barbie doll, shoved a black heart in her chest, and gave her the mind of the world's biggest asshole. Then the Sugar Plum Fairy, in a drunken mistake, turned her into a real girl.

Fuck her.